I [insert bad behavior here] because I love you

Have you seen Disney-Pixar’s Up?  If you haven’t, do yourself a favor and watch it.  Do yourself another favor and keep a box of tissues nearby because this movie doesn’t just tug on the heartstrings, it goes all Indiana Jones on your ass and rips your still-beating heart out of your chest and shows it to you.  It’ll make you want to hug your grandpa.  Heck, it’ll make you want to hug everyone’s grandpa.

AnyoldmeneatingfrenchfriesatMcDonaldsalonemakemesad, the dogs in the movie have collars that vocalize their thoughts, and one of the dogs, the dumb but lovable* Dug, immediately bonds with Carl, the old man.  The affection is not mutual.  At one point Dug hides under Carl’s porch as the house floats away, and when Carl finds Dug on the porch, Dug offers this pitiful explanation:

I hid under your porch because I love you.

This phrase has been on my mind a lot because Dexter has been on a rampage.  He is getting over his second bladder infection in 6 months and in addition to the occasional (and understandable) lapses in bladder control, he’s taken to chewing holes in things around the house that are not dog toys.  I’m really trying to be as patient as possible with him, and so every time I come home to find a puddle of pee by the front door, I imagine him offering this semi-apology.

I peed on the floor because I love you.

When I find a small rip in my new comforter:

I chewed on your comforter because I love you.

It helps with the rage.

And so, in an effort to turn my frown upside-down, I’ve entered Dexter in the Bissell MVP Pet Photo Contest.  If he wins, he’ll get his mug on a Bissell box and $10,000 will be given to a charity of my choice (BADRAP, “a small and busy non-profit organization of pit-bull owners, trainers, educators, rescuers and supporters” in the San Francisco area.  They take in dogs from dog busts all over the country, including the Vick dogs, and are fighting the good fight for pit bulls everywhere though education and training of people and dogs.), PLUS a Bissell vacuum or deep cleaner and a $500 shopping spree.

MVP Pet Photo Contest sponsored by BISSELL, maker of pet vacuum cleaners.

But friends – we need your help!  Please vote for Dexter!  You only have to vote once.  Judging by past weekly winners, he’ll need about 1000 votes to win.  If you’d help spread the word, I’d appreciate it.  The official Twitter hashtag is #dexterwantstobefamous.  Let’s start a trend.

And yes, I’m shameless.

*Of course the loyal, lovable dog is a lab mix, while the bad, mean dogs are Dobermans, bull dogs, and molosser-type dogs.

6 thoughts on “I [insert bad behavior here] because I love you

  1. I tend to chew people’s heads off when I have a UTI so a hole in your comforter is a blessing, I would say. I mean, we don’t need your bloody stump on the front porch to perpetuate the mean pit stereotype, do we?

    I love BADRAP. They’re one of my favorite charities.

    Go Dexter! You will win!

    Thanks for the encouragement, and the warning. I hope to never cross you when you are suffering any urinary tract discomfort.

  2. What a great post! We voted for Dexter. I hope he wins; I would love for a bully to get national attention, and force a big company to acknowledge them as family dogs. I hope we can gather the votes he needs!

    Thanks again!

  3. Dude, I think you jinxed me. I got ready to comment last night about how much UTIs in dogs suck and how glad I am Louis hasn’t had one in a while … and guess who peed the bed last night. Dang it!

    Anywho, going to go vote for Dexteroni now…

    Poor Louis. I hope he feels better soon.

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